Relationships are important to me because I love people. I am 40 years old, a wife, and mother of 2. How can I not have relationships. I grew up with a single young mom and no dad. My family took care of me and I was raised to think that we are responsible for each other. It is important to me to make sure that I have positive influences and people around me that I can lean on and that can lean on me.
My most important relationship that I have other than God is my husband. We have been together for over 16 years and I could not do some of the things that I do without him. We learned how to love early but we also had to learn how to fight and argue using God as our guide. He has been my rock and without this relationship I don't know if I would know how to care for others around me in the positive way that I do.
I also have relationships with other family members that mean so much to me. My uncle has been a positive role model in my life since I was born. He has guided me through college and even helped me see different lights when it came to friend relationships. He has been like a father that I didn't have.
One thing that I recognize about myself is my quickness to remove people from my life when I feel that they have betrayed me. I feel that if you are not with me you are against me. This is not always true and I have had to learn to do better by listening and forgiving. This is hard because growing up I always felt like I had to fight to be in relationships and it was not easy forgiving those that didn't treat me well.
The characteristics that make these relationships special is the honesty and the respect. All of these people are open, honest, and loving to me. They tell me what I need to hear and what I don't want to know. They are always there for me and I love being there for them.
My grandmother was a caregiver in her home and she always taught me to love everybody. This is special to me because it gives me strength when something is not going well at my job. I remember that these children might have things going on at home that I might not know about. I also remember that I have to be a leader and guide them into positive situations and that doing that by example is the best way for them to learn.
Sounds like you have a great family bond with you grandmom. Having small children can change your life so that they can say "my mom did it with us so l know l can do it better". You have a beatiful family chic....
ReplyDeleteDeWana,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your blog, thank you for sharing your personal reflection. I especially appreciated where you include God and your husband as I can relate. As much as I truly love my children and family, it has been my faith and my husband that I have my deepest relationship with. We too have learned over the years how to communicate and not yell, to listen and to compromise. Susana
Hi Dewana, this was a very positive reflection as well as words of encouragement to those who cannot share the same. I always had the deepest relationship with my children. I have learned to communicate, listen and guide my children to their success.
ReplyDeleteHi Dewana, I enjoyed reading your blog. I especially liked how you admitted that you and your husband had to learn to fight and argue with God as a guide. That was powerful. I will be marrying next year to my lifelong friend. That was also one of the things that we had to learn to do. We had to learn how to allow each other to express themselves and respect each other's feelings. Thanks for sharing
ReplyDeleteHi Dewana,
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I have had many trials in the few years we've been married but we are trudging through together. My life as a child was with my grandmother, dad, and sister without my mom in the picture. I am forever grateful to my late grandmother. My mom was not around until I was in college and then it was not much at all. She passed away two years ago. I wish we had had a better relationship or at least a longer one. You were very lucky to have your uncle in your life that was you guide. We all need someone to give us that extra boost. I'm glad you are working on listening and forgiving in some ways I have had to do the same. In your learning and understanding to forgive you will be able to help students and your own child to do this as well. It's hard sometimes when we've seen broken relationships as a child to know that there is good relationships. It's good that you have your husband to be your rock and strength, to lean on and lean with.